Today during JROTC, one of my friends started asking me about my boyfriend. Which is all well and good but it seems that lately any time anyone brings him up in the conversation, they ask me what will be happening seven to eight months from now, when I leave for Indiana for school and he leaves for basic training in Georgia.The answer is simple:
I. Don't. Fucking. Know.
I know that people's intentions are mostly good, they're concerned about my well-being and want to make sure I make what they see to be as the right choice. But honestly, it's getting old.
I don't know what will happen. I never did know what would happen. I've never been in a relationship this serious, I've never loved someone like I do now. I don't know what I will be feeling months from now when the time comes to actually part, I don't know what I'll be feeling when I'm at IU and he's hundreds of miles away. I don't freaking know. That's the bottom line.
In the meantime though, I plan to spend as much time with him as I can. I plan to make the most of the time I DO have with him, and I wish people would just stop talking about it. It's like they keep bringing up what they see as the eventual demise of my relationship, and while I know that whenever you're in a relationship there's only two outcomes (you break up or you get married), I don't know why people keep bringing it up.
Later, after that one friend finished talking to me about the long-distance thing, another friend brought it up and started speaking strongly against it, and just kept going on and on about how he disapproved of people staying together after high school and whatnot. I know the vast majority of high school relationships fizzle out, and before I used to be totally against staying with someone past high school, especially if it would turn into something that involved long distance. But now, things are a lot more complicated before. Emotions can make it difficult to think clearly, and what might seem like the right decision from the outside can end up being the totally wrong decision, in the end. Right now, I'm thinking that if you really love someone, then it's worth a try. You never know what will happen, and if you don't even try to see if it would work, then you'll always be stuck with that "what if?".
In any case, I dislike it when people constantly try to push their opinions on me and to convince me to do something without having in mind what I want in my life. I dislike it when people bring up things that are very personal to me like they're things that they are qualified to comment on with complete confidence. It's bullshit. Every relationship is different. Every situation is different, the people are different, the motivations as well.
Unless I bring it up, either to rant or to seek advice or just to talk about it, I'd appreciate it if people would refrain from talking about long-distance relationships and all that jazz. It will be difficult enough to deal with once the time comes, but having people bring it up just out of curiosity or to push their opinions onto me makes it even worse.
Some things just shouldn't be brought up out of sheer curiosity because they are difficult issues to deal with on their own.
Anyways, I'm tired. Sorry for the rant, but that's honestly how I'm feeling right now.
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